always look on the bright side of life
by CatchDaSnitch-HeDeservesPain
Summary: You question me because I’m different I question you because you have ketchup on your face very random. no slash. please Read & Review & advise!
1. Chapter 1

AN1: this is set in book 2, because I like book 2 best because they've already established enemies etc, but sapphire is in 4th year. Oh Yeh and no Mary Sue's are here. Or I tried to have no Mary Sue's but it's a bit more difficult than I first expected. It is inevitable that in my fanfiction to have about 3 million spelling mistakes. So please don't point them out to me, unless it REAAALLY bugs you then that's okay.

AN2: I don't own any characters; if I did do you really think I would be writing fanfictions about them? No I would be hanging out with them. Oh but I do own sapphire! Woo go me!

AN3: This is the last note so just hear me out. Please review because reviews make me happy and update sooner.

Chapter 1: You question me because I'm different; I question you because you have ketchup on your face

I sat there in the compartment flicking through kerrang and hoping for something interesting to happen.

_What do you mean something interesting to happen? You're going to a different school for magic you idiot!_

GAH why am I always contradicting and insulting myself?

_People are coming, be cool, feet up, gum, twiddle hair TWIDDLE HAIR YOUR HAIR YOU MORON! _

Stop insulting me! Ah gum, feet, twiddle twiddle. A guy! Not a particularly attractive guy but a guy none the less.

_Why do you always dis blonds, blonds are sexy!_

NERDS are sexy.

_Stop arguing he's looking at you._

"Guys in here! There's only a dorky looking girl." The blond called to his friends. DORKY LOOKING GIRL!?! Twat.

_Well you do look dorky, what were you thinking dying your hair purple?_

Oh shut it. Oh my god. His friends are uglier than he is.

_He' not ugly._

What do you know?

_I'm another part of you! And a part of you finds him attractive so therefore you are in denial if you say anything different._

…zip it.

_No!_

"Hey babe." Said an ugly looking guy with black hair and wonky teeth.

Babe? What the fuck? Who did he think he is.

_Don't say anything._

"I have a name, but I'm not sharing it with the likes of you." I snapped back. I don't ever listen to my more practical side.

_Damn right you don't. Listen to me more!_

"Oh feisty, I like that in a woman. Especially in bed." He said smirking horridly.

Bed what on earth was he talking about? I'm 14 for Christ sake.

_Pervert_

To true

_Yay agreement._

Let's stick it to him

_I think that he was joking he doesn't have the balls._

If I'm right then this should be fun.

"Marcus flint."

I looked at him up and down.

"Maybe a 5, if you're lucky"

He exchanged looks of utter confusion with his companions.

"I need at least a 7 before I perform."

_Er what does that mean?_

I'm not sure I'm just making it up as I go along.

"Shut it bitch!"

"Oh Yeh insulting is such a turn on for me." I said sarcastically.

"Really?" asked the blond with a smirk.

"No, not really."

"What does turn you on, younger guys?" the blond asked jokingly (hopefully) and with a mischievous smirk.

"Malfoy, Draco Malfoy. 12"

_12? How desperate does he think I am?_

"I'm 14 you twat!"

The carriage was annoyed at this comment.

_I think its best we leave._

To true. I gathered up my stuff and walked off to find another carriage. It took me great restraint to not knee Draco in the balls. Fortunately I didn't have great restraint so as I left, Draco was on the floor.

Every carriage I looked in was different; from prefects to younger students. Girls chatting. Boys larking about. Carriages with too many students and then practically empty carriages. I found one with just 3 people in. I couldn't be bothered to look for a different one and I saw Draco and his cronies coming up and down the train looking for me.

"Hey you wanna sit here?" asked one of the ginger boys that were in the carriage.

"I need to hide can you help?"

"who from?"

"that egotistical blond twat."

"come on in" said the darker coloured boy. They all looked older than me, but they were willing to help and as soon as I had said 'egotistical blond' they jumped up.

_Just hope that they're not a sick as the other guys._

Is that a dung bomb? What does he need that for?

_See everyone has them; it was a good idea to spend our last 3 sickles on a box of them. _

Yeh but now we can't get chocolate.

"Ready Fred?" asked one

"Ready George" asked the other twin. God it would be confusing to go out with one of them.

_Where did that idea come from Saphy?_

Shut it.

"Throw lee, throw." Yelled one of the twins. Lee threw and it was beautiful. The bomb hit Draco squarely between the eyes. They shut the door just in time before the bomb exploded. Locking it from the inside. I couldn't help but practically die laughing. I really wanted to yell, "Alright toy boy?" but I didn't want to embarrass myself in front of the guys who had just done the best prank I had ever seen.

"That was the right guy right?" asked George, I grinned manically.

"It was, but even if it wasn't that would be a great prank."

"I like this one, George, she's feisty"

_Again with the feisty, why do guys like feisty girls so much?_

Dunno, probably better in bed…

"Aaaanything of the trolley?" I heard coming along the passage way.

"Damn, they do sell chocolate on the train. I wish I hadn't spent my last 3 sickles on dung bombs." I muttered to myself.

"A hoi hoi did you just say you wish you didn't spend your last 3 sickles on dungbombs? You spent your last 3 sickles on dungbombs?" asked Fred… probably.

"I know I really shouldn't have but I needed them! I mean what would go with the stink pellets and I'm not aloud to buy fire whiskey yet." I continued to talk.

_Stop talking you're babbling._

"and it I'm not…sorry, I'm babbling."

Oh my god they don't even know my name. They don't know my freaking name!

_Just play it cool when you tell them. Be sophisticated_

"I'm sapphire." I blurted out.

_Wow! Very sophisticated, congratuwelldone!_

Oh zip it you…or zip it me rather oh whatever.

"Why is your hair purple then?" asked lee

"LEE!" yelled Fred and George angrily.

I was predicting that question.

"You question me because I'm different, I question you because you have ketchup on your face." I said.

_What the fuck! Never EVER say that again!_

"I have ketchup on my face?" he asked questionably.

"You will if you don't shut up." I threatened,

_Calm down!_

"So, saphy-baby, I can call you that can't I? Great!" asked George, I interrupted him

"No, you may not."

"Aww come on don't be so uptight!"

"You would be uptight to if you had a blond egotistical 12 year old twat wanting to screw you and you're a new student who needs to catch up with 3 years of magical work and spent half her money on joke shop products."

"4th year then, and new. Just like us, spending all that money on dungbombs and what not." Lee commented looking at Fred and George.

"And what not? What are you on about?" I ask, he sounded way too posh for his own good.

"What?" he asked offended.

_He was offensive to us, we were offensive back, it was self defence!_

"Don't be so bloody posh, say ain't sometimes and fart. I like a guy who acts like a guy." I said. I saw Fred's grin widen, as George let out the loudest fart.

"You speak our language, but tell me why do you like guys like that?"

"It let's me be like that." I said, burping about 3 seconds later then cracking up.

_EW that's gross why do you do that?_

Because I can, I'm making progress here, shut it.

"I'm Fred weasley."

"I'm George."

"Weasley? Ah I've heard of you now. My Mum works with your dad in the ministry. She's the secretary of the head of misuse of muggle artefacts office. Looks a bit like a potato?" I asked, wondering whether they had met her.

"Mrs. Spudy is your mother?" asked Fred questionably.

"That's her!" I said. I paused. "Except her name isn't Mrs Spudy, it's Mrs Davidson."

"Sapphire Davidson. And you called me posh."

"Oi!" I snapped, "That threat with the ketchup still stands!"

Lee nodded rolling his eyes and grinning.

"Lee Jordan." He reached his hand out to shake my hand. I hi-5'ved it instead.

"See I'm not uptight!" I grinned.

"Well, we better get ready, we'll be a Hogwarts soon. You won't mind us getting changed in here do ya?" asked Fred.

"3 guys stripping for me? Not at all." I laughed. Smiling, the twins took off their jumpers.

"ba da dah! Deh de da dah" I said trying not to laugh.

"I'm getting changed elsewhere." Said lee picking up his uniform, "I would suggest you do the same safz"

"Ok uptighty!" I said also picking up my uniform.

"Don't call me that!" an angry lee said loudly.

"Don't call me safz then." I argued back grinning jokily.

I knew we could be heard arguing all the way down the hall, but I didn't care. God hope I'm just placed in Gryffindor.

Yup, it is a short chapter but hey! Reviews! Me would most like reviews!


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2:

Chapter 2: 

Me and lee argued until we got to the carriage.

_Lee and __I__ honestly saphy your grammar is appalling!_

Who cares about grammar?

_Mother, fa-_

Mum's not here is she! NO she ain't!

_Tut tut grammar grammar_

Shut it

"What are you talking about, My Chemical Romance? You have not lived until you have seen scissor sisters live!" Lee told me.

"Scissor sisters, that's a little bit queer for you isn't it?" I asked.

_How rude._

"Well that's Lee all over isn't it, a little bit queer." Said George as we re-entered the carriage. I thought that was a quite amusing comment.

"Shut it you! You know what I mean it's like what is My Chemical Romance compared to Weird Sisters"

"Weird sisters? Been there, so old. Muggle bands are so next season. Just wait."

"I'll hold you to that."

"So Sappho tell us about you!"

"Fred, don't call me 'Sappho'"

All was silent in the carriage

_Did you say something wrong?_

How should I know… hang on you know what I said you're me!

_Just say something_

What?

_Anything, just sound smart!_

"What?"

_Oh well done high and mighty intelligent one._

Shut up you

"You called me Fred." Fred said.

_I heard that_

Me too!

"and there is a problem with that?"

"Only Lee can tell us apart." George said.

"Wow, should I feel proud? Privileged?"

_You are very rude you know_

Well that means you are?

_Well then you're more right than I am?_

I suppose so…

_What's happening in this world?_

Should I know?

_Shush they're talking_

Oh that's better now

_You missed the question you idiot!_

"SHUT UP!" I yelled before realising

"Pardon?" asked Fred with one eyebrow raised. George and lee wore identical looks

_Nice going numb-nuts_

"Oh erm… nothing I was just thinking."

"Ok well we're at Hogwarts now"

"Really?"

"Well, where else did you think we were going?"

"Sorry, I'm just a bit spaced out at the moment."

"Aww I think our special ikle-girly is nervous," said lee tauntingly, whilst George rustled my hair. I gave my worst death-glare but they didn't notice.

_You are nervous, why don't you find some nice girls to hang out with that'll help you out._

Oh my god get a grip woman, I need to pull a prank to get rid of my excess excitement.

"How much time do we have?" I asked rooting a plan in my mind.

"About 20-25 minutes I believe." Said lee looking at his watch

"Perfect." I said smirking evilly

_You're up to something_

You think?

"You're up to something" said George

_That's what I said!_

"You think? Really? Little young me? An innocent girly?" I asked sarcastically whilst fluttering my eyelashes. Unfortunately my timing was off and I let out the most gigantic burp.

Me and all the guys were rolling with laughter, yet again.

"So Sappho, what did you have in mind?" ask one of my new amigos

"…something that those slytherins will never expect."

"Which slytherins would that be?"

"As many slytherins as I can possibly manage in 20 minutes."

"That's about 15 for us." Fred pondered aloud.

"Bet you 5 galleons I can do more than that in half the time."

"You're on! But it has to be a descent prank"

"And you get a bonus if you prank Malfoy"

"And please remember to give us any new ideas for when we start our joke shop"

"And give yourself credit. It's more fun that way"

"I will, ok, yes and I won't." I said as I undid the top three buttons on my shirt and rolled up my skirt, much to the boy's confusion.

_What ARE you thinking?!_

I'm going to kick some slytherin ASS!

_Sure go for that._

I opened the carriage door "you coming?" I asked though the boys just stared at my now visible bra.

"Oi! My face is up here!" I yelled annoyed making them snap out of there dazes as they mumbled there apologies

"Are you coming?"

"Wouldn't miss it for the world."

**A.N very very very very sorry I haven't updated! I forgot about this fic for like… years! Please review and tell me to start updating if you like.**

**Chapter 3 IS coming soon! I have written it after all**

**Ok so keep imagining, keep reviewing, keep reading and keep breathing.**

**Love you lots**

**Becky xx**


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